Does God forgive suicide? I have read many responses to this question (as it is asked often). There are some with a hardline approach, saying that no, he will not, supported by reasons that one is taking away God's gift of life, one cannot repent for the sin after death, and also that it falls under the commandment "thou shalt not kill". For them, those reasons over rule any reasons for suicide save perhaps mental illness. There is however another view I have read that no, a believer is not eternally damned, generally following the view "once saved, always saved". I am curious for your thoughts on the subject.
Before answering this question, I think it’s good to make note of a few things. The first is that SUICIDE IS NEVER A SOLUTION TO PROBLEMS. If you feel abandoned and tempted to commit suicide, know that you are cared for and loved by your family and friends more than you think. Tell a friend or family member what you’re thinking, and be as open and honest as possible (even the people who love you and care about you the most can’t read your mind). Also, if you ever suspect that a friend or family member is considering suicide, talk to them. Just ask, “You’ve seemed really upset lately. Have you been considering suicide?” and let the conversation go from there. I know this is intimidating, because we often fear that we’ll say the wrong thing. But trust me; nothing we say is worse than remaining silent. The main point isn’t necessarily for you to say the right thing anyhow; it’s for you to listen and show love. If you feel the situation is out of your control, contact a professional counselor. (If you don’t know where to find one, ask your pastor and he/she will help you.)
Now all that being said, the question this reader poses is not an easy one to answer, because the Bible doesn’t directly address the topic. We really don’t have any examples in Scripture of Christians committing suicide. (The closest we come to is Judas.) So, to find the answer to our question, we need to piece together things that we do know from the Bible…
Death is not the will of God. In the gospel of John, Jesus says, “I have come that they may have life, and have it abundantly.” Likewise, Jesus defeats death through his resurrection, implying that death is God’s enemy (and defeated enemy, at that). God is the giver of life. From the time of our birth, our life is in the hands of God. Suicide is, among other explanations, an attempt for us to take control of our lives, which are not ours to control. Even those who argue that God forgives suicide will still admit that suicide is not God’s will. If they though otherwise, they wouldn’t have to argue that God would need to forgive it.
God is a forgiving God because of Jesus Christ. Our sins are forgiven in and because of Jesus Christ, and not on our own merit. Those who argue that God does not forgive suicide are assuming something that often goes unmentioned: that our being forgiven depends on seeking forgiveness for every last sin we commit. Hence why suicide can’t be forgiven; once we’ve committed the act, it’s too late to repent and seek God’s mercy. The problem with this assumption is that it is entirely impossible for us to confess every last sin we commit. We’re just plain too sinful to be able to identify every sin. Our forgiveness rather rests in the act of Jesus Christ. God desires us to turn to Jesus Christ and to repent of our sins, even naming those sins to him specifically, but it’s not as if God is listening to our confessions with a checklist of every sin we’ve committed making sure we’ve covered them all. Christ, as our intercessor, makes sure that to confess all of our sins on our behalf for us. So, our salvation doesn’t rest on whether or not we confess every last sin we commit. It rests in Jesus Christ.
Given the above, we can conclude that God can, and does, forgive suicide. But, we also must be aware that this does not mean that God permits suicide. Forgiveness and permission are two very different things. Suicide is forgivable, but it is still a sin and still displeasing to God. God is the author of our life, he knows the plans he has for us, and desires to use our lives for the sake of His purposes.
Pastor Matt, your thoughts?
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Dear reader,
The answer given by your Pastor Mike gives a very important perspective. I would read it and think carefully about it. A serious problem with much Christianity is we come to think about sin and forgiveness like we think of grocery lists, i.e. through questions like, "Did I get this part right? Did I get everything I needed? Have I covered the bases?" Very individualistic questions all about what "I" am doing or "I" think. "Have I got this doctrine correct?" The error of that perspective is that it sees God as inactive and largely absent. We're thinking of us doing the active working, repenting, confessing, believing, etcetera, while God sits down and merely records or remembers and judges us later. Of course God does "record" and "remember" in a sense (the Scriptures speak of God's "book" keeping track of our every word, thought, and deed from before we were even born!), but the Lord is far from distant. God is closer to you than your next breath or heartbeat. In Him we live and move and exist. All of life depends on Him: when He turns his face to the earth, it springs to life, and when He turns away from it, all crumbles. (It says that in the Psalms.) Think of Peter when he denied Christ. Christ was standing nearby, and turned and looked at Peter when he denied him. In Jesus we see God the Father. Every act you do, every thought you think, and every word you speak your Father hears, knows, and sees. God is no distant judge; God is the ever present Spirit of Truth. Most importantly, God is Love. God isn't near as one who hates you, or looks down at you, or is plotting about how angry He is. God is actively governing all of creation in such a way as to save and heal it -- to save and heal you. That's a mystery you could spend forever thinking about!
I wanted, besides commending Pastor Mike's answer to us all, to bring in one additional angle. There are two ways to ask "theological" questions such as this one. One way of asking questions is to ask them in a disengaged, objective way, like the way you'd think about some scientific fact which is interesting but not immediately relevant. The other way is to ask about a matter of faith and despair, death and life. The second way is not "objective" or disengaged; the way in which one reflects and answers the question has to do with the rub of real life.
One can ask this question about suicide and forgiveness in the same two ways. You can ask about it objectively. "Say, Pastor Mike, there was someone -- I don't know who -- who was contemplating suicide, and then h/she (I don't know which) did it. Would God forgive?" Alternatively, you can be engaged in the question, in the struggle: "Pastor Mike, a friend of mine is really depressed, and I'm worried that she's going to kill herself, if not by deliberate suicide, then by worry. What would God have me say? What would God have me do?"
Now, as a student of theology, I'd say that while many Christians try to do theology the first -- objective -- way, that those Christians aren't really doing theology at all. Real theology is always done the second, subjective and engaged way. The reason why is because of what I said at the beginning of this response, when I was commending Pastor Mike's answer. God isn't a distant God. God is the one who drew near us when God the Son became Mary's son. God is the Holy Spirit flowing from Heaven into our hearts. God is the Father looking at us through Christ and in the Spirit and saying, "I love you!" Because God is involved, and no servant is above the Master, we are called to be involved, too. Theology is us using our minds in partnership with God, learning His ways and having our thoughts come to look more and more like His. Therefore, all real theology is of the form, "What is God like? Who is God in this situation? What is the Lord doing? How can I discern the Lord and join Him where He is?" That's theology.
From your question, I can surmise that there is a reason why you are curious about suicide. You yourself may not know why you are curious about it; it may be that there is simply so much despair and pain in your world, that it is beginning to bear down on your thinking and imagining. You are engaged in a world where people are despairing of life. For you to know the answer to your question in that world, in a way you need to modify your question just a bit. Rather than asking, "Say there was a suicide. Would God forgive?" instead ask, "Lord, my friends are in pain. They're killing themselves -- some literally and quickly by suicide, others by slow, creeping despair. I know you're not far away, but nearby -- right here with us, with me. What are you doing Lord? How would you have me pray? What would you have me say? How can I communicate your forgiveness and hope and show people that you are the Lord of Life and enemy of death?" Those are big questions, and the answers won't come easily. If you have the courage to ask the questions, I think it will take some time to learn them, and you may not even realize you're learning the answers as you're asking the questions, but the Lord will be faithful to guide. Also, you don't have to -- in fact, you shouldn't! -- try to have the answers as an individual, for Christ has a body, and He teaches in that body through the Holy Scriptures. As you walk with those realities, asking the bigger, engaged questions, you'll taste and see that the Lord is good, as I'm sure you already have given the form of your question!
The peace of the Lord be always with you,
Pastor Matt
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